I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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