fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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