I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
