If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize