; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
