Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
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