So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
