I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Randomize