If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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