bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
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