he puts the penis in happiness.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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