you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
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