Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
