y did u give ur computer a hand job?
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
