in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
