Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Don't tell me you're on acid again
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
