UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize