i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
