i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
is it fun? or sober?
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize