high people should be assigned attendants
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
