He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
There's even glitter on my cock...
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