my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Your penis caused this!
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