so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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