I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
