The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
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