cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
