How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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