Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize