lets start a swedish sibling band together
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
