Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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