This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Randomize
