nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
