shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Randomize
