why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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