i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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