Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Randomize