woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize