Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Randomize
