That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
