It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
