I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
