i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize