i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I'm having to shit out rocks
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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