Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize