She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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