We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
