if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
