I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
