Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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