I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize
